After all grift wrappers have been ripped open and Christmas leftovers have all but disappeared I, just like everybody else, have started reflecting on how I’d spent the last 12 months of my life.
It didn’t feel like it while I was going through it, but this year turned out to be one heck of a surprise; the stuff that I was able to do and the places I saw weren’t close to what filled my thought bubbles at this point last year. But then again, now that I think about it, my thought bubbles today barely resemble the bubbles of thought from yesteryear. But I digress.
This year, I’ve been blessed with opportunities to travel more than I thought I would in a lifetime. I got to meet and interact with very different people with equally varied opinions, all the while discovering who I could really call friends. And somewhere between it all I’ve also become a bit of a fountain pen and calligraphy fiend with her own little shelf of inks and nibs.
But taking off the rose tinted glasses, I will be honest and admit that this year hasn’t just been happiness and giggles. The darker parts of it have been some of the darkest in my life and this year has made me acknowledge and face the ugly parts of myself that I didn’t and don’t like. It’s been a year of questions met with more questions and made worse by even more questions, but somehow I am okay with this.
At the end of it all, I guess the biggest lesson that I’ve been able to take away from 2015 is that uncertainty is okay. I used to need, need plans and I freaked out whenever I didn’t know what was about to happen or I didn’t know the answer. I was under a lot of self-inflicted pressure to be close to omniscient, and yet, I found out that I was not and could never be.
It used to kill me until I learned that not having everything figured out was not just okay, it was normal. Eventually I learned that spontaneity could be a good thing, and not having planned every single calendar day leaves you open to more surprising things.
So here’s to a more open heart and a more open mind in the next year, and to all the upcoming things I don’t know about yet.
And just in case you wondered what my year looked like, here’s a pretty good summary.